I’ve never lived in a country where English isn’t spoken, not even Alabama. The closest I’ve come is, I’ve eaten in Chinese buffets, where the waitresses are all Chinese girls with maybe 50 English words to their names (not counting their names, which are not “Vicky” or “Margie”, like it says on their nametags), and I’ve asked whether or not to tip them.
However, working in a proprietary software is analogous to living under a foreign tongue. Especially, one as perversely documented as WordPress.
I’ve given up attempting to modify WordPress’ basic “2011 Theme” into something useful to me, and have imported the WooTheme known as “Canvas”. There’s hoke, here. Oops – I meant ‘hope’. Replacing “2011” with “Canvas” was instantaneous. I’ll say that much. And there’s other nice nuances.
WordPress makes all “Canvas”s controls immediately available. However, maybe I should have kept “2011” in place just a tad longer. I’m not sure what will happen re: previous posts. That’s why there’s two here, so that I can learn what will happen to the other one.
Alas, that may not tell me much. Yesterday’s post is now further down the scroll. That’s swell. But I want to know what’s in store by 2012, when I have 35, or 2013, when I have 350 posts and an archive to consider. “2011” had an archive already set up. Does “Canvas”?
Of course, I could learn by doing, if I could import the 126 blog posts from www.freedmania.blogspot.com. I scrupulously followed the directions, which are so simple a Neanderthal wouldn’t even have to stop scratching himself to follow them, and merely succeeded in proving once again that Any Statement That Begins with the Phrase, ‘All You’ve Got To Do’ is a Lie. The only true part of it is that you’re going to do it. Whoever’s talking is going home.
By the way, a measure of the ungainly non-intuitivenes of WordPress is the fact that I’m blogging about it at all. This space should be filled with the vitriolic good humor so easily inspired by Newt Gingrich, or maybe wry wisdom to offset the boorish hopes of the detatched who want Occupy Wall Street to look more like “occupy the Columbia U’s President’s Office” of 35 years ago. The fact is, other than the three day weekend spent eating, I haven’t done or looked at anything other than this goddamned “plug-and-play” thing for close to a week…
Well, it’s not All WordPress’ fault. I’m ignorant of the most basic “social network” fats and practices. I don’t know what to “link” to, or what RSS is used for re: a blog. That stuff’s on me.
But: I want to put a column of links in the right-hand column of the landing page. I’d like some control over fonts. I need some guidance on handling comments, and a sign-up mechanism for readers. I’d expect that documentation sitting out in plain view somewhere near at hand.
Well, maybe it’s in here somewhere. I had to send out for a hard hat and a miner’s lamp. Fortunately, you can get almost anything on Amazon these days. Stay in touch. I’ll see you all in a couple of days.